Two thousand fifteen: year in review

It is my usual custom on this day to take an inventory of the past year by month. I've become increasingly bad at remembering things, and this year, I don't have the advantage of having my journal close by or my ipod for remembering playlists. But I shall try to fill in with some thoughts about 2015 which was a very interesting year in some ways and completely unremarkable in others. Isn't that always how it goes?

The word of the year seemed to be JOY. I didn't mean for that to be the theme that came back over and over, but I found myself seeking after joy more often than not. Joy didn't mean happy, exactly. It was a big, growing, stretching year. 2015 was one of the most 'alone' years I've ever had, but it was not lonely. I've never been the person who looked on the bright side, and I don't think that was the lesson that I was learning this year. But I definitely learned something about self worth, selfishness, attitude, that there is a time to let go and a time to dig in for the long haul, and setting your mind on things that are good and holy... looking for the absolute truth when you are preoccupied with how you feel.

It has set me up to be excited for the next year that as my health improves, I can be looking for opportunities to engage in relationships. I'm excited to see how God moves. My desire is to make more and more moments available, open, and welcoming for others to engage with me. And for the Holy Spirit to minister and work. If I could pre-pick a word for the year, I think I would choose KINDNESS. I want to bring kindness and gentleness into my speech, actions, etc. in a way like I never have before.

And now. Some highlights from 2015 via one of my favourite mediums: photo.

My most played according to iTunes...
10 - Sunshine by Tom Misch
9 - Geronimo by Sheppard
8 - Wake Your Soul by The Hope Arsenal
7 - Paris by Fickle Friends
6 - Elastic Heart by Sia
5 - Modern Love by Coasts
4 - I Shall Not Want by Audrey Assad
3 - Ohio (Filous Remix) by Damien Jurado
2 - Coming Over (Filous Remix) by James Hersey
1 - Vivaldi's The Four Seasons (Spring) 2. Largo recorded by Simon Standage & Trevor Pinnock

Also loved...
Justin Bieber's album Purpose, One Direction's album Made in the A.M., Keaton Henson's album Dear, The Staves, and all manner of music that has been deemed "sassy elevator jazzy coffee time" music.

Well. That's all I can think of.
Hello, 2016.

The body of Christ

Well, I have succeeded in the second baking fail of my life. I was asked to make a cake for a funeral dinner for tomorrow so I decided to make an oatmeal cake with coconut on top. Of course, the coconut topping broiled much quicker than I thought it would so it burnt crispy. Luckily, the whole top scraped right off, and I did it a second time and watched it closely the whole time. Dexter must have thought I looked kooky sitting on the kitchen floor staring at the broiler.

The virtual prayer night for Central went pretty well tonight. About 5 people logged in for the hour, and we had some good posting going on. Really enjoyed this video about prayer that I found:

Also, one of the prompts was to list things that are true of God's character (recognize that Mom?) and give Him glory for that list. So I provided the list that I have been compiling over the years and had people add to it. I really appreciated seeing others' posts.
We discussed what it means to be the body and prayed about how to love well. Then we listened to this song and asked God where we are called to be His body right now... who are we supposed to love specifically...

In other news, I don't have jury duty tomorrow so I will be going to my doctor's appointment as scheduled. So. That's good. I'm guessing that if I get called in, it will be on Wednesday. But we shall see. Praying that it is not Friday because I already have big plans for that day. Well. Off to bed so I can greet the day well tomorrow.

Buffer day

This was the day that we shall consider a buffer day between being sick and being well. I feel maybe eighty percent now. The day went pretty quickly for me, and I really am not feeling completely myself, still. But maybe tomorrow. Wanted to share with you a couple of the photos from our family photo shoot at  Thanksgiving.

Christmas begins now

On Friday night, we had the Advent Labyrinth at church. Leading up to the fact, I think I had a flu bug. I was feeling awful, and I wasn't sure if I would even make it through setup. But I did. And the event. Although setup was awful, my brain was working about as well as the scarecrow's, and I felt like I had eaten bad eggs... the Labyrinth was beautiful. It was exactly everything I had hoped and prayed it would be when I envisioned it months ago. The soft candlelight, the carols played on violin and piano... A hush falling over the crowd of around thirty people of varied ages all mesmerized by the glow. So peaceful. For a taste... Just put on this music and look at these photos.

In the Bleak Midwinter

   

^Enjoying a cup of coffee Saturday morning after a successful event the night before

Giving thanks in 2015

So as I always seem to end up doing, I've left quite a large gap of time that I would try to fill in, but I just don't want to bother. I do kind of like telling the story of what has happened with a little bit of distance between when it happened and the telling... I can more accurately figure out how I feel about it in retrospect, but at a certain point, I just give up with trying to record it at all.

Therefore. This will be a lot of pictures I want to share. And a couple bits of thoughts I have had.

On my drive to Fairview for Thanksgiving, I was post-drome migraine. I put One Direction and Justin Bieber (new albums) on repeat and tried to learn words. It just reminded me a lot of driving up north last January as Grandma was passing away. I had been listening to a new One Direction album then, and there was a similar cold feeling in the air. This, being my first wintry drive since then, had a reminiscent quality. Nearly every time I made that drive last January, I would see an owl in the same spot between Luzerne and Mio. So on this drive, I asked God if I could please see one.
I asked for an owl, and He gave me two hawks and the most unexpected, gorgeous sunset. What we want and what we need or are given don't always line up. But you know, I was really thankful for those beautiful blessings; reminders of our Creator.


Not knowing if I would be able to be with the family for Thanksgiving for the couple of days leading up to the holiday was awful. I was in pain with migraine. I was under stress from work. I was hurting emotionally. And I was not dealing with it very well. BUT GOD knew where I needed to be. And when I needed to be there.
In the right timing, I arrived home and spent wonderful days with the people I love so very much. Such a full heart. An aching heart, yes. But full because I am grateful that I have had so many dear things and people in my life. (I'm thinking of Grandma Druber and Germaine right now.) This trip was full of blessings and rich moments for me. I just recognize God knowing me so intimately and knowing what is going on in His world so well, and I want to give Him glory for knowing perfectly.
I'd also like to shoutout my sister. Courtney is one of my very favourite people in the world, and I am so insanely thankful that she is in my life. I feel SO lucky that I get to be her sister and friend. She is just such a beautiful person, and I love that she is a becoming person. The older we get, the closer we get; I just feel so privileged to be growing up with such a lovely, grace-filled person like Court.






We all know one of my big challenges of life is learning how to deal with/express my emotions. Thanksgiving was a giant emotion supercharged time which I am probably still working out. The holidays, I know, can be a very sad time. But I refuse to indulge in sadness. I am a JOY-bringer, and this season is the ultimate reminder celebration of HOPE. And Christians are the HOPE-filled, JOY-givers who are going into all corners of the world sharing the Gospel of PEACE. So that's what I am going to do. Wherever I am, I will be a representative of a life changed by JOY.

"Great indeed, we confess, is the mystery of godliness: He was manifested in the flesh, vindicated by the Spirit, seen by angels, proclaimed among the nations, believed on in the world, taken up in glory." -- 1 Timothy 3:16