How do we build bridges in the midst of tragedy and division?
How do we breathe peace into our lives?
A few weeks ago, I found myself watching a livestream posing the first question. The ladies who were speaking are people who I have considered faith role models for a couple years now. They spoke of how they experienced bridge building by having conversations across things that naturally tend to divide; this conversation being specifically about race. They posed the question, and I was genuinely interested in what their answer would be. I suppose it makes sense that it was based solely in their experience: have the tough conversations. And that answer was not enough for me.
I know this is a difficult topic to talk about, and it is certainly not one to which I am flippantly coming. I can't ignore that my life experience has been one of "white privilege," which informs the lens through which I view the world. Every person has certain biases which make conversations difficult to have because we all try to relate to each others' experiences. Which sometimes comes off as arrogant or pitying; something that we may or may not intend. We may intend empathy, but we sometimes end up condescending. One thing I have learned from my friend Kelsey who is a social worker is that whether or not our experiences overlap, your feelings are valid. Even if I don't "get it," they are not my feelings and experience, and it is so belittling and horrible of me to make you feel minimized. I must work to create a space where your feelings are cared about and that you know I consider them valid. Otherwise, I am providing a "there, there... suck it up" brand of empathy also known as sympathy. For a really great illustration of true empathy, check out this clip from The RSA: Brené Brown on Empathy
Especially on social media, I tend to use the avoid and ignore tactic when it comes to the many opinions on racism, sexism, privilege, etc. I have convictions, but Facebook or Twitter is not where I will be sharing them. And it's not where I go to seek out others' opinions. (Let's be honest... I'm looking for photos of your cute new puppy or grandchild or checking to make sure my dad hasn't posted any terrible groaners of jokes recently.) So anyhow, I realize that one is either incredibly brave when one makes his or her convictions known online or one simply doesn't realize the controversial maelstrom that will potentially be created.
Especially on social media, I tend to use the avoid and ignore tactic when it comes to the many opinions on racism, sexism, privilege, etc. I have convictions, but Facebook or Twitter is not where I will be sharing them. And it's not where I go to seek out others' opinions. (Let's be honest... I'm looking for photos of your cute new puppy or grandchild or checking to make sure my dad hasn't posted any terrible groaners of jokes recently.) So anyhow, I realize that one is either incredibly brave when one makes his or her convictions known online or one simply doesn't realize the controversial maelstrom that will potentially be created.
In light of watching the livestream, not being satisfied with the answers provided, and all the tragedies that seem to be happening daily, I have been asking God for wisdom. Another question came to my mind over and over in these last few weeks: how do we breathe peace into our lives? Now I firmly believe that if your attention is called to something multiple times, it is important. When a thought lingers in your mind -- pray it. When an image sticks with you -- pray it. When a person comes to mind -- pray. This is the Holy Spirit at work in you! So I have been praying about daily peace, breathing peace into my life and into others, and for wisdom specifically surrounding the question of breathing peace into lives.
Yesterday, I journaled a bit on the subject while I was praying.
How do we breathe peace into our lives? Consider your sphere of influence. Practice peaceful living -- first within yourself. This means a surrender and sanctification. The holy life God has called you to and blessed you with is not one of fear, chaos, and worry. The 'how' of getting to that point is both simple and difficult: get to know God better. How do you do this? He has given the Truth in the form of the Bible and left the Holy Spirit to testify to you. Doubt flies away when you listen to the Spirit telling you that you are a child of the King. First within. Then.
Take all that confidence in Christ, restful spirit, and heart that is now honed to listening and go forth just looking to listen in your daily live and movements. Where would God have you? Now I'm not saying stop all life and stay away from human contact until you are 'ready.' I'm simply saying, work on your relationship with God, focus on Him and His holiness, and fashion your behavior after Christ. Holy words. Holy actions. Holy thoughts. Dwell on such things. (Phil. 4:8) It's not about ignoring realities or denying the existence of negatives. It is about seeking after holiness which identifies true needs, meets others as friends in Love, and puts aside selfishness.
Okay. I get that none of this is easy. It is not supposed to be. Living a life worthy of the calling we have received as Christians (Ephesians 4, Colossians 1:9-14) is not going to be a trivial thing. It is your ultimate goal. It is messy. It is complicated. It is painful. It is full. It is hopeful. It is holy.
I realize that this doesn't explicitly answer either of the questions I initially posed. And that was why I was so frustrated at the beginning of all of this. Because I wanted a tangible plan toward healing some of the ache and hurt that I feel for the brokenness of the world. In all truth, I don't have a more concrete answer than seeking the Lord and listening, acting, and reacting in Love. Taking time to process. Allowing God to help you see the world through His eyes and maybe a different lens than your own experience has thus far allowed. But after talking with God and reading His Word (and continuing to do so), I am more able today than yesterday to say, "It is well with my soul."
