I am a strange mix of feelings. Productive, exhausted, pleased with myself, not quite satisfied. I am very good at cooking myself into a right dramatic state. It has been a generally quite chill day. Didn't start out particularly good. I've gotten to the point where I really do not need to set alarms to wake up anymore because my body just refuses to stay asleep. This morning I woke up that way. Naturally. But of course, although my body wanted to be awake, it did not actually want to properly function. So Dexter and I had a good old fashioned lie in, and eventually I coaxed myself out of bed. Yesterday I tidied the living room/dining room so this morning I did the kitchen. I have a few more dishes to do that didn't fit in the dishwasher, but at least a tad bit of sanity is restored. (Tidy kitchen, tidy mind.)
In the afternoon, I started with some yoga which I will probably finish after I am done typing this. Made some lunch and while I ate, I made a new playlist for July; although, now I realize July is nearly over. So I guess it is mostly just a summer playlist. (My favourite from the whole list is the blogtrack.)(Sometime I will have to write about how I feel about music because as I've been talking to Kels about it, I realize that I feel differently about music than I used to.) Once I was tired of arranging a playlist, because honestly, it is a painstaking labor of love type process, I put it on and got to work. My to do list felt as long as my arm so I narrowed it down to the things that were supposed to be done today, Sunday, next week, and indefinitely. This is how I work. Lists. Well, in no time at all, I had vaporized my today list and started on my indefinite list. Coffee and phone chat break in the middle, of course. Today's coffee brought to you by Panera, Columbian roast. I think we have enough for one more time, and then we will be on to trying a new roast. I'm hoping that maybe in a couple of paychecks, we will be able to get a coffee bean grinder so we can use our French press to the full effect.
Now I suppose I should go finish up my 20 minutes of yoga as per Dr. Morse's suggestion. And then supper. Oh, but now I realize I didn't actually write about the visit to Dr. Morse. Hmm. Okay. The succinct version is that I was extremely nervous, but he was very nice. I feel like I can talk to him, and he is listening to what I have to say. I also appreciate that he immediately had suggestions about what I can do while waiting for tests to come back to start feeling a bit better. (Managing diet and exercise better) I had one test while I was there, and I will go for blood work on Tuesday morning. When I go back to Dr. Morse on August 5th, we will be able to discuss results, how my diet/exercise has been going, and talk about what the next steps are. I feel like this is where I start building my "health Avengers" team. I already have neurologist Dr. Roth on board, and now I'm adding DO Dr. Morse. These are the people with the training to take down the illness that is running rampant. The best thing about Dr. Morse was that he made me feel like I could do it. Sometimes with doctors, I have felt like I had to earn their trust or respect about how I handle my body and pain, but Dr. Morse seemed like he immediately valued my opinions on how I am feeling and believed that I am strong enough to conquer this thing. I think I can acknowledge now that I am in a daily fight for health and personal well-being. I am not willing to sit idly by while my life crashes around me. I am going to pursue a better life.
[Waiting at the dr.]
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